Nerves of Steele, Will of Iron and Dreams of Gold
Part 7
by SteeleChic 1999



His eyes were shining with tears. His voice had been steady but Dr Barnett asked anyway,

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Remington said unwaveringly, "Save Laura's life."

"What?" Laura choked out, her astonished gaze turning to him, "No! You can't make this decision for me, it's my baby too, and my body!"

"Laura please," he pleaded, "It's so much more than just your body, it's your life we're talking about here."

"And our baby's life too," she insisted quietly, stricken, "A life I'm supposed to protect."

"Not at the expense of your own," Remington tried to reason, "Laura, we can always have other children, but there's only one you," his voice was strained. He didn't know how she was keeping her emotions in check when he was dangerously close to breaking point.

"I said no!" she protested again, her voice shrill, as Remington noted with relief that she was at least feeling the pressure of their situation and not repressing her emotions. Her eyes flew to Dr Barnett, "They can't do it without my permission, can they?" she demanded.

"No, but Mrs. Steele, I urge you to reconsider," Dr Barnett answered. Realizing that the Steeles had been unable to discuss their decision because she'd had to calm Laura's earlier outburst with a sedative, she continued, "You need to discuss this and come to some agreement. I'll give you some more time but if you wait much longer it may be out of your hands. We've waited too long already." And on that somber note she left the room.

"Laura please," he said again, his voice barely more than a whisper, grasping both of her hands with his, "What are you doing?"

"It's our baby," she implored, her voice thick and low, something which Remington had learned by now was a telltale sign that tears were threatening. He watched them pool in her eyes. She blinked furiously, fighting to control her emotions.

"Yes, it's our baby," Remington agreed, "And that's why I believe Dr Barnett when she says that chances are it will survive. With two such strong parents..." he trailed off.

"Strong?" Laura laughed, a harsh sound that echoed in the room, "I'm not strong, I'm terrified," she admitted weakly, the tears finally beginning to fall.

"Of what?" he asked gently.

"Of losing the baby, of losing you," she told him through tears, barely able to hold back her sobs.

"What? No," he tried to soothe her, although he didn't quite know what she was talking about, "If you let the doctors deliver the baby you'll both be fine. Nobody's losing anyone."

"NO!" she protested again, angry that he didn't understand what she meant, "I won't do it!" she cried out in anguish, "I won't take away the one thing that means the most to you - a family!"

"What?" he choked out again, stunned by her outburst. He studied her intently, his own eyes filling with tears, emotion tumbling in on him. What on earth had made her think that? But suddenly he knew. His own words echoed in his mind as he stared at her, tears free falling and sobs gasping.

That one sentence -"If anything happens to this baby" had haunted her, he realized guiltily. He squeezed her hands, his heart aching both with the pain of their decision and her anguish and also with the immense love he felt for Laura, such an incredible selfless person, more of a gift to him than any child.

"Laura, listen, please listen," he begged, forcing himself to speak through his emotion. His own tears began to fall as he continued, "You'll never lose me," he whispered, "How could you? I'm a part of you. You gave me a name, a career, an existence, I can't live without you Laura, and you're my life. I love you and I need you, please let them help you? It's OK," he finished on a sigh.

Standing swiftly, he released her hands and slid his arms around her, kissing her tenderly, holding her fiercely. Her arms tightened around him as she held him close. Their tears mingled and dropped soundlessly onto the sheets.

"I love you," he whispered into her hair, "Please let them save you, make you healthy again."

"I love you too," she responded brokenly, cut off by a hiccup.

"I'll be right here by your side," Remington promised, "Please Laura?"

Taking a deep breath, she sighed, resting her head back wearily, her eyes closed, lashes glistening with tears. Her arms stayed firmly linked around his neck.

"OK," she whispered in resignation, "OK, let them do it."

Remington let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and felt some of the tension seep from his shoulders but he knew their ordeal was far from over. When he would have released her to go and find Dr Barnett, Laura held tight and wouldn't let go.

"Please don't leave me," she begged, her voice barely more than a whisper, "Just hold me a little longer?"

Standing by the bed as he was, leaning down to hold her, was hell on his back so he eased onto the bed beside her.

"Of course, darling," he murmured, drying her tears gently with his fingertips as she laid her head against his shoulder, "I'm right here."

He felt her shuddering sigh reverberate through his own body and held her tighter, trying to offer some comfort. She was petrified and he didn't know what else to say to make it better when he was just as terrified if not more so. He chose actions instead because, after all, they were supposed to speak louder than words.

Her eyes still closed, she raised her face to his. Gently he pressed a kiss to her temple and each of her eyelids before finally touching his lips to hers. Clinging to him, she kissed him back, trying all at once both to draw strength from him and to comfort him as he had comforted her. She wondered suddenly who had been being strong for Remington while he had been being strong for her?

Unable and unwilling to leave Laura's side just yet, Remington turned his head to see their family waiting anxiously at the window. He'd totally forgotten about them since Laura had stunned him with her refusal to deliver the baby but there they all were, waiting patiently.

His eyes turned to Daniel, the only other person who knew him almost as well as Laura did. Daniel always seemed to understand and it was no different now. With a nod of his head, Remington told Daniel all he needed to know and the older man quickly summoned Dr Barnett, who arrived in seconds.

The sight of the Steeles, locked in each other's arms on the bed, stabbed at her heart. There was something about this couple that just enchanted Dr Barnett but she couldn't quite put her finger on what it was. They seemed to radiate energy and strength like none she had ever seen before. She liked the Steeles and was determined to do everything in her power to try and get both mother and child through this fiasco in perfect health but everything rested on their decision. Hoping that they'd reached an agreement, Dr Barnett asked gently,

"Mrs. Steele, Mr. Steele, I'm afraid I need to know and I need to know now. What would you have us do?"

Laura took a deep breath, lifted her head from Remington's shoulder and opened her eyes slowly. Empowered by the safety she felt in his embrace she answered quietly,

"Do it. Deliver the baby."

Dr Barnett almost sagged with relief, "You've made the right decision," she assured them, reaching out to depress the buzzer to summon more medical staff.

"We hope that's true," Remington told her.

Dr Barnett tried to smile reassuringly, "Let me explain what's going to happen," she began, "Obviously your body isn't ready to give birth naturally, so we're going to deliver the baby via caesarian section. Usually we keep the mother awake, but because of the eclampsya, that's too risky, we need you completely calm and sedated. Unfortunately, Mr. Steele, you won't be able to be in there with us. Please don't be alarmed when we rush the baby off to the neo-natal unit, it's just a precaution we take with all premature babies, but remember you child is going to be very tiny and will most likely need special care. As soon as we know anything, I will personally come and tell you."

Remington stood up as several other medical personnel entered the room but maintained a firm grip on Laura's hands. Dr Barnett turned to the hospital staff, barking orders,

"Prepare OR 2 for an emergency c-section, call anesthesiology and get them to send someone down, get a cross match on Mrs. Steele's blood and alert neo-natal, tell them to have a humidi-crib ready and oxygen tanks on hand, we're about to have a baby. Time is of the essence people, go, go, go!"

They all hurried off to fulfill Dr Barnett's orders as she approached the bed and began detaching Laura from the machines.

"We've already waited longer than I would have liked," she told them, "Are we ready?"

Laura and Remington nodded mutely, still tightly gripping each other's hands.

"Take good care of her," Remington pleaded hoarsely, his chest tightening with pain and a feeling of futility.

"We will, Mr. Steele," Dr Barnett responded.

He stayed by her side, never once letting go of her hand, until they reached the operating room.

"I love you!" he called as the doors swung closed and he came to a stop in the empty waiting room.

Each taking one arm, Mildred and Daniel led him over to where Frances, Abigail and Donald were already sitting.

The waiting game had just begun.

To Be Continued . . .

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