- Nerves of Steele,
Will of Iron and Dreams of Gold
- Part 6
- by SteeleChic
1999
Laura's fingers tightened around Remington's as she took a deep,
shuddering breath. News like this was never easy to deliver and
Dr Barnett knew that it had sent the Steeles reeling, she could
see it in their eyes, but she could also sense that they were
a strong couple and she could tell by the way he reached out
automatically to gently wipe away her tears that there was much
love between them, enough to get them through anything, even
this.
"I'm saying it's a possibility," Dr Barnett answered
his question as gently as she knew how, "As I've already
mentioned, to continue to carry the baby places you at risk of
kidney failure, liver disease and even brain hemorrhage, or in
simplest terms, bleeding in the brain, which can be fatal and
is almost always damaging."
"And to deliver the baby would restore Laura to perfect
health?" Remington inquired.
"Yes, Mr Steele," Dr Barnett responded, "Right
now, it's the only thing that will."
"But at what cost?" Laura choked out, her eyes closed
to hide her pain, her voice thick with emotion.
"Well, Mrs Steele, babies are usually fully formed after
six months, they look like little babies but their organs aren't
completely developed," Dr Barnett explained, "After
seven they can survive outside the womb but many don't,
naturally, babies are born after nine months because that's when
they can survive. As I'm sure you're aware, you're in the early
stages of the seventh month, it's highly probable that your baby's
lungs will be under-developed and it may not be able to breathe
on it's own. If that's the case we can administer oxygen but
too much oxygen poses the risk of brain damage. To try to carry
the baby to term will increase it's chances of survival assuming
that the toxemia hasn't restricted the flow of blood, which is
also a possibility, but, as I said, if you try to carry to term,
you endanger your own life."
"What would you suggest we do?" Remington asked, his
voice strained.
"I think you know what my answer would be," Dr Barnett
told them, "But it's not my decision to make. I would suggest
you call your family, have them come in and support you and help
you decide what to do. I know how hard this must be for you to
make a decision but I can only give you twenty four hours. Rest,
think carefully and I'll come back tomorrow for you answer."
Heading towards the door, she stopped and turned, gesturing for
Remington to join her. Laura's eyes were still closed, tears
glistened on her lashes. She had asked just that one question
and then fallen strangely silent. Remington made a quick decision
and moved to meet Dr Barnett at the door.
"I realize how difficult and painful this must be for you
Mr Steele," Dr Barnett began, her voice a low whisper, "But
I must ask you to consider what I told you and try to make your
choice objectively. That's why I urge you to call your family
in to help you. The decision will be yours, your wife is, for
obvious reasons, far too emotionally involved, and to have to
make a decision about something that is essentially part of her
own body will be psychologically damaging. I hope you realize
I don't mean to underestimate your own pain, but you see what
I'm getting at?"
Remington merely nodded, a hand on her arm showing Dr Barnett
that he indeed understood what she was trying to say.
Laura shifted, drawing his attention, and he moved quickly back
to her side, taking her hand with one of his own, the other moving
to stroke her forehead. When her eyes opened, Dr Barnett was
gone. He noticed more tears had fallen, leaving her face streaked
and her eye lashes wet.
"I'm so tired," she whispered brokenly, referring not
only to physical but also mental exhaustion from the news they
had just been given.
"I know," Remington soothed, "I know, try to sleep,
my darling, however hard it may be. We have plenty of time to
think and decide," he lied. Twenty four hours wasn't nearly
enough time to make the most important decision of their lives.
Surprisingly, Laura did sleep, but Remington knew there would
be no chance of his doing the same. Instead he rose from the
chair and went in search of a pay phone so that he could call
Abigail, Mildred, Frances and Daniel. Not knowing quite yet what
to say, he simply told them that Laura had been rushed to hospital
and that he need to see them right away.
When Daniel was on the next fight in, and Mildred, Abigail, Frances
and Donald were on their way, Remington returned to Laura's side
and sat silently beside her in contemplation of her relatively
subdued demeanor. He worried about her because she was never
one to take anything without a fight.
He realized she need him to be strong but he wasn't sure he could.
He needed her to show how scared she was, how scared she must
be, so that he knew that what he was feeling was normal.
His greatest fear, the thing that had kept him from committing
to her for so long, was perilously close to being realized, the
fear that the one thing he loved more than life - his Laura -
could be torn away from him, that no sooner would he put down
roots only to have them ripped away again, just as they had been
when he was a small child.
He was forced to leave Laura's side when Mildred, Abigail, Frances
and Donald arrived. Because she was still in Intensive Care,
she wasn't allowed more than one visitor at a time, so Remington
let Abigail go in to see for herself that her youngest daughter
was, for the moment, all right.
Standing over her daughter, Abigail stared wordlessly at the
machines still beeping and flashing out Laura's vital signs.
She remembered that through her own two pregnancies and Frances'
three, neither of the other Holt women had encountered such problems,
but Abigail smiled sadly as she realized that only Laura could
have handled them. She had always been such a strong person but
now she looked so tiny and so weak.
Turning, she saw her son-in-law staring through the window. He
was so devoted to her daughter. Abigail moved to leave the room,
both to let Frances see her sister and so that Remington could
explain to her exactly what had caused this set back.
Remington watched Abigail exit the room and motioned for Frances
to go in. Donald had done an admirable job of keeping the two
Holt women and Mildred calm, and Remington reminded himself to
thank him later, but none of Laura's family could be kept waiting
any longer. Nor could Mildred, who Remington could see was fairly
sick with worry over her surrogate daughter. He watched fondly
ad Mildred held Laura's hand, smoothed her hair back and straightened
the sheets. Time was running out and he had to explain.
With Laura never out of his sight as they stood outside her room,
Remington carefully relayed the doctor's diagnosis of Laura's
condition and the options available for treating it but before
they could discuss it further, he saw Laura's head move on the
pillow.
Laura woke with a start. She was dazed and confused and more
than a little distressed. She looked around her, the reality
of where she was sinking in, and she tried in vain to remember
what she had been dreaming. Only one thing resonated in her head,
her husbands voice, "If anything happens to this baby.......if
anything happens to this baby.....if anything happens to this
baby......"
The sight of his face calmed her a little, his sky blue eyes,
his encouraging smile, his gentle voice, "Hi there, sweetheart,"
he said softly, "Your family is here to visit with you."
"What time is it?" Laura asked groggily.
Looking at his watch, Remington's eyes widened slightly, "It's
almost five in the afternoon," he told her. God, where had
the day gone? Every minute that passed bringing them closer and
closer to the moment of truth.
"Your sister and Donald, your mother and Mildred would all
like to see you," he said.
Her brow was furrowed but her gaze blank as she answered, "Sure,"
she said, "Send them in."
The news about Laura's condition had Abigail quite upset, so
Remington waited with her while first Mildred then Frances and
Donald spent a little time talking with Laura. When Abigail had
calmed down, she went back into the hospital room and sat by
her daughter.
Outside, Frances and Donald talked in hushed tones while Mildred
stood by her boss' side, her arm around him as they stood in
contemplative silence, Remington refusing to take his eyes off
his wife for even the briefest of moments.
Suddenly, Laura's voice pierced the relative quiet of the Intensive
Care ward.
"NO!" she shouted brokenly, her head thrashing from
side to side on the pillow, "I wish everyone would stop
telling me it's going to be all right!" she screamed before
bursting into tears.
Reaching her side, Remington gathered her to him as she sobbed,
"It's not all right, it's not all right! It's
NOT!!"
Stroking her hair and holding her tight, Remington didn't know
what else to do as he felt the racking sobs shake her body.
"Shh," he told her, "I'm here, darling, I'm here,
shh Laura," he tried to soothe her but nothing worked. He
raised weary eyes to meet Abigail's terrified gaze as she backed
out of the room and away from Laura's screams and sobs.
"She'll be OK," he said, as much for himself as for
Laura's mother, "At least now she's acting out, showing
her fear..."
Upon witnessing Laura's outburst, Mildred had reacted quickly,
asking a nurse to page Dr Barnett, who arrived within minutes.
Checking the read out of the heart rate monitor, which had gone
berserk through Laura's distress, Dr Barnett summoned a nurse
with a cart full of medications as Remington rubbed Laura's back
in soothing circles and her sobs subsided into shuddering sighs
and gasping breaths.
Selecting a hypodermic needle and filling it with a clear fluid,
the doctor explained, "I'm going to give her something to
make her sleep, I'm sure you remember how crucial it is to keep
her blood pressure down," Remington nodded, watching as
Dr Barnett injected the liquid into Laura's arm. She continued,
"Her outburst is reassuring though, it wasn't healthy for
her to repress her emotions the way she did," she paused
again to look at her watch, "She'll sleep right through
the night now. I'll see you tomorrow and we'll make a decision,
but for now, why don't you go home and rest?"
Remington merely shook his head. There was no way he was going
to leave her and Dr Barnett knew that even as she made the suggestion.
Laura's sighs and shudders came with less and less frequency
until finally they stopped altogether and her hand unclenched
from the front of his shirt and she slept.
Remington looked to the four anxious faces peering through the
glass and realized that he would have to leave her at least long
enough to finish explaining to their family and to somehow make
the most painful decision of his life.
He eased Laura back onto the bed and pulled the blanket up to
her chin. Placing a gentle kiss on her forehead, he reluctantly
went back outside to be with Mildred, Abigail, Frances and Donald.
Four pairs of eyes followed him expectantly.
"She's OK," he said tiredly, "She needed to vent
her anger, to release her fear. She's sleeping now, Dr Barnett
said she'd sleep right through the night," he stopped, running
his hands wearily over his face. Looking up at Laura's family,
his voice wobbled, "I need your help."
Placing a hand on his brother-in-law's back, Donald spoke up,
"Hey, have you eaten anything? Come on, let's all go to
the cafeteria, get something to eat, talk." Remington nodded
mutely, grateful for the support. Mildred snaked her arm around
his shoulders protectively as they walked in silence towards
the hospital cafeteria.
Daniel arrived as they were eating and Remington filled him in
on Laura's condition. They all talked for hours and no-one slept
at all that night but the family had all reached the same decision
and finally Remington knew what he had to do.
When the cafeteria closed, Remington returned to Laura's side
and the others sprawled in the uncomfortable waiting room chairs
outside the room. Nobody said a word. They didn't need to. Each
knew what was on the other's mind but could only imagine what
must be going through Remington's.
He sat in silence in the chair beside Laura's bed and watched
the sunrise through the window. The beautiful sight did nothing
to lift his spirits as he waited for that dreaded moment when
Laura would wake and Dr Barnett would return for his answer.
Laura awoke quiet and reserved but with an aura of painful acknowledgment
of their situation. She looked fondly at her husband, "Did
you sleep?" she asked him.
"Never mind me," he told her softly, appreciating her
concern and amazed that she could still think about other people
when he could think of nothing but what was about to occur.
Dr Barnett entered the hospital room around nine a.m. She gazed
at the couple in front of her before she spoke, "I'd say
good morning but I'm sure that's the last thing you need to hear,"
she began, "I'm sorry but I need an answer. Mr Steele, what
do you want me to do?"
Remington raised his steady gaze from Laura and looked the doctor
in the eye. This was it, moment of truth, and he knew what he
had to do.
"Save her life."
-
- To Be Continued . . .
- Back Home CaseBook
E-Mail Next